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Good catch. I try to proof-check everything before posting, but occasionally something still makes it through. It’s fixed now.
Well, I have a general idea of where I’m headed with the storyline. I know the place where I want to end up, and I have several key plot points to hit along the way. The storyline is essentially broken up into sections, and then I script out each section into smaller bits. That helps me manage everything and keep a consistent flow.
Hmmm… Strange… I cant seem to find anything wrong with these anymore. Oh well, I guss Ill just haft to sit back and enjoy them.
Oh, and as to my lack of comments/bitching Ive been having issuses with my lap top, so feel free to slack off Jim, as I wont be able to breath down your neck every time you do something I dont like.
:)
Ah HA! Ive been rereading the dialog, and I now have a legitimate “concern”.
The line for the AI, “You are a madman, Ferial.” Now, Im not going to mention that Ferial is misspelled, not gonna say it at all. But the term “madman” to be used on an Elite? Isent that kinda speciesest? Hes not a man, hes an Elite. Dont know how to say madman in Elite speak… Though I can say it in Leet.
Not to sound like I’m picking at you, but of course they wouldn’t be speaking in English, he’s an Elite and the AI is alien. It’s not like they attend English classes every Thursday.
The translation software (*ahem*) that Jim’ll be using obviously doesn’t have a good fit to the word they are using, so it used “madman” instead.
Of course, “madElite” wouldn’t have the same effect, although it would have been mildly amusing.
I’m a little rusty on the events. What’s happened? Why shouldn’t Ferial be here?
Actually, “rusty” isn’t the right word. “Lost the plot” is better.
Um, what? Ferial’s not misspelled in either case on this page.
As for the use of ‘madman,’ Ferial is male, and for the sake of clarity (and reader enjoyment by actually being able to understand the dialogue), we’re just kind of ignoring the fact that there are probably some language barriers here (and besides, Ferial and the Reclaimer were clearly having conversation in the first section, so there really can’t be that much of a barrier). ‘Madman’ in this case is simply a generic term with obvious connotations for the reader with little bearing on origin of species.
And it’s ok to be ‘rusty on the events.’ Not everything has been revealed yet. I’m dangling a little bit of ‘bait’ out there, so to speak, to let the reader know that something massive is underway that involves Archimedes and the fate of the universe. More will be revealed soon. :)
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March 26th, 2008 at 7:41 am
Hmm, love the creative use of the custom powerup for the AI (archimedes?)
Oh, and you mixed up the fonts in the first frame.
Nice one! The plot thickens with every new release.
Just out of interest, have you got the plot written down or do you develop it frame-by-frame (so to speak)?
March 26th, 2008 at 11:32 am
Good catch. I try to proof-check everything before posting, but occasionally something still makes it through. It’s fixed now.
Well, I have a general idea of where I’m headed with the storyline. I know the place where I want to end up, and I have several key plot points to hit along the way. The storyline is essentially broken up into sections, and then I script out each section into smaller bits. That helps me manage everything and keep a consistent flow.
March 26th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Hmmm… Strange… I cant seem to find anything wrong with these anymore. Oh well, I guss Ill just haft to sit back and enjoy them.
Oh, and as to my lack of comments/bitching Ive been having issuses with my lap top, so feel free to slack off Jim, as I wont be able to breath down your neck every time you do something I dont like.
:)
March 26th, 2008 at 11:51 pm
Ah HA! Ive been rereading the dialog, and I now have a legitimate “concern”.
The line for the AI, “You are a madman, Ferial.” Now, Im not going to mention that Ferial is misspelled, not gonna say it at all. But the term “madman” to be used on an Elite? Isent that kinda speciesest? Hes not a man, hes an Elite. Dont know how to say madman in Elite speak… Though I can say it in Leet.
March 27th, 2008 at 6:37 am
Not to sound like I’m picking at you, but of course they wouldn’t be speaking in English, he’s an Elite and the AI is alien. It’s not like they attend English classes every Thursday.
The translation software (*ahem*) that Jim’ll be using obviously doesn’t have a good fit to the word they are using, so it used “madman” instead.
Of course, “madElite” wouldn’t have the same effect, although it would have been mildly amusing.
I’m a little rusty on the events. What’s happened? Why shouldn’t Ferial be here?
Actually, “rusty” isn’t the right word. “Lost the plot” is better.
March 27th, 2008 at 8:03 am
Um, what? Ferial’s not misspelled in either case on this page.
As for the use of ‘madman,’ Ferial is male, and for the sake of clarity (and reader enjoyment by actually being able to understand the dialogue), we’re just kind of ignoring the fact that there are probably some language barriers here (and besides, Ferial and the Reclaimer were clearly having conversation in the first section, so there really can’t be that much of a barrier). ‘Madman’ in this case is simply a generic term with obvious connotations for the reader with little bearing on origin of species.
And it’s ok to be ‘rusty on the events.’ Not everything has been revealed yet. I’m dangling a little bit of ‘bait’ out there, so to speak, to let the reader know that something massive is underway that involves Archimedes and the fate of the universe. More will be revealed soon. :)
November 13th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Oh noes. I’m detecting signs of a comment war.
November 15th, 2008 at 8:13 am
Well, it would be if it wasn’t for the fact we moved on more than half a year ago.
November 15th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Thank you for telling me. My life now has a purpose.